{"title":"Zynville PD Hoodies","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Aggressively Average department, in hoodie form. The patch, the shield with \"In 6mg We Trust,\" the tin logged as department property, the black-and-white Crown Vic, the Zynville Golf Club, and the Stop n Rob and Hood Quick Stop that end up on every call sheet.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eEach one is a Cotton Heritage M2580 with the design on the front and ZYNVILLE POLICE at the top of the left sleeve. Sizes S–3XL. Zynville is a parody, not a real department. The tees are in \u003ca href=\"\/collections\/zynville-pd-shirts\"\u003eZynville PD shirts\u003c\/a\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"zynville-police-patch-cop-hoodie","title":"Zynville Police Patch Cop Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eReal departments sew their patch on the shoulder. Zynville put theirs across the chest of a hoodie, because subtlety has never been the department's strength: Goons on one side, Nicotine on the other, three stars and the department tin in the middle.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eZynville Police sits at the top of the left sleeve, so it reads like issued gear from a department that doesn't exist.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFront: the Zynville Police patch. Upper left sleeve: Zynville Police. On Black.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eHoodie details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCotton Heritage M2580 premium pullover hoodie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% cotton face; 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront pouch pocket, 3-panel hood, matching flat drawstrings\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSelf-fabric patch on the back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL. Sourced from Pakistan\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns small. For the best fit, order one size up.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Nightshift Goons","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":67662703034526,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-S","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":67662703067294,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-M","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":67662703100062,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-L","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":67662703132830,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":67662703165598,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-2XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":67662703198366,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-3XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0722\/5288\/3102\/files\/ead9d1d7a2faecba12baf7fe252dcc12_preview.png?v=1792641516"},{"product_id":"zynville-pd-tin-cop-hoodie","title":"Zynville PD Tin Cop Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eEvery squad room has one: the tin that got confiscated, taped up and labeled like evidence. Zynville logged theirs as department property and added a warning for the rest of the squad. Being a goon will land you in IA. Being a goon is a lifestyle.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOn a hoodie, it's the one piece of evidence you're allowed to take home.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFront: the property of Zynville PD tin and warning. Upper left sleeve: Zynville Police. On Black.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eHoodie details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCotton Heritage M2580 premium pullover hoodie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% cotton face; 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront pouch pocket, 3-panel hood, matching flat drawstrings\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSelf-fabric patch on the back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL. Sourced from Pakistan\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns small. For the best fit, order one size up.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Nightshift Goons","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":67662706376862,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPDTINC-BLACK-S","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":67662706409630,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPDTINC-BLACK-M","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":67662706442398,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPDTINC-BLACK-L","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":67662706475166,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPDTINC-BLACK-XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":67662706507934,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPDTINC-BLACK-2XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":67662706540702,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPDTINC-BLACK-3XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0722\/5288\/3102\/files\/46926b84a3f57985272a1186c55acd33_preview.png?v=1792641526"},{"product_id":"zynville-police-shield-cop-hoodie","title":"Zynville Police Shield Cop Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe crest of the Zynville Police Department, motto \"In 6mg We Trust,\" with the department's black unmarked sedan inside the shield. It's the closest thing to a department sweatshirt Zynville will ever issue.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBlack for the night shift, carbon grey for everything else.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFront: the Zynville Police shield. Upper left sleeve: Zynville Police. On Black or Carbon Grey.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eHoodie details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCotton Heritage M2580 premium pullover hoodie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% cotton face; 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront pouch pocket, 3-panel hood, matching flat drawstrings\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSelf-fabric patch on the back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL. Sourced from Pakistan\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns small. For the best fit, order one size up.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Nightshift Goons","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":67662706573470,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-S","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":67662706606238,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-M","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":67662706639006,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-L","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":67662706671774,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":67662706704542,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-2XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":67662706737310,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-BLACK-3XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carbon Grey \/ S","offer_id":67662706770078,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-CARBO-S","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carbon Grey \/ M","offer_id":67662706802846,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-CARBO-M","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carbon Grey \/ L","offer_id":67662706835614,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-CARBO-L","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carbon Grey \/ XL","offer_id":67662706868382,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-CARBO-XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carbon Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":67662706901150,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-CARBO-2XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carbon Grey \/ 3XL","offer_id":67662706933918,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEPOLICE-CARBO-3XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0722\/5288\/3102\/files\/539abd50ef3ed440c65117e5c0fd2ede_preview.png?v=1792641540"},{"product_id":"zynville-aggressively-average-cop-hoodie","title":"Zynville “Aggressively Average” Cop Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eZynville doesn't promise excellence. It promises consistency. Aggressively Average, printed across the front of a heavyweight hoodie on the department's parody pack.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAn honest gift for the officer who's tired of mission statements.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFront: the Zynville Aggressively Average pack. Upper left sleeve: Zynville Police. On Black.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eHoodie details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCotton Heritage M2580 premium pullover hoodie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% cotton face; 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront pouch pocket, 3-panel hood, matching flat drawstrings\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSelf-fabric patch on the back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL. Sourced from Pakistan\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns small. For the best fit, order one size up.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Nightshift Goons","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":67662706999454,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEAGGRES-BLACK-S","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":67662707032222,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEAGGRES-BLACK-M","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":67662707064990,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEAGGRES-BLACK-L","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":67662707097758,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEAGGRES-BLACK-XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":67662707130526,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEAGGRES-BLACK-2XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":67662707163294,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEAGGRES-BLACK-3XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0722\/5288\/3102\/files\/7ebeef42cf5a8bea2d2cde1be2c7f4b3_preview.png?v=1792641554"},{"product_id":"stop-n-rob-corner-store-cop-hoodie","title":"Stop n Rob Corner Store Cop Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eDispatch doesn't even need to give the address anymore. The Stop n Rob is the retro gas station sign for the corner store every beat has, printed on the front of a black hoodie with Zynville Police underneath.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWear it on the next coffee run. Just don't stop at that one.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFront: the Stop n Rob sign over Zynville Police. Upper left sleeve: Zynville Police. On Black.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eHoodie details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCotton Heritage M2580 premium pullover hoodie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% cotton face; 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront pouch pocket, 3-panel hood, matching flat drawstrings\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSelf-fabric patch on the back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL. Sourced from Pakistan\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns small. For the best fit, order one size up.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Nightshift Goons","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":67662707196062,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-S","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":67662707228830,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-M","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":67662707261598,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-L","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":67662707294366,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":67662707327134,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-2XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":67662707359902,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-3XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0722\/5288\/3102\/files\/fbab79cbfdfabf26f5733508c2a92c19_preview.png?v=1792641567"},{"product_id":"hood-quick-stop-corner-store-cop-hoodie","title":"Hood Quick Stop Corner Store Cop Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eEvery town has a Hood Quick Stop: bright sign, flickering lights, and somehow the busiest parking lot in the district after midnight. This one sits on a clear blue sky above Zynville Police, printed on the front of a black hoodie.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFor the officer who knows the clerk by first name and the camera angles by heart.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFront: the Hood Quick Stop sign on a sky panel over Zynville Police. Upper left sleeve: Zynville Police. On Black.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eHoodie details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCotton Heritage M2580 premium pullover hoodie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% cotton face; 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront pouch pocket, 3-panel hood, matching flat drawstrings\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSelf-fabric patch on the back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL. Sourced from Pakistan\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns small. For the best fit, order one size up.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Nightshift Goons","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":67662707425438,"sku":"NSG-HD-HOODQUICKSTOPC-BLACK-S","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":67662707458206,"sku":"NSG-HD-HOODQUICKSTOPC-BLACK-M","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":67662707490974,"sku":"NSG-HD-HOODQUICKSTOPC-BLACK-L","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":67662707523742,"sku":"NSG-HD-HOODQUICKSTOPC-BLACK-XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":67662707556510,"sku":"NSG-HD-HOODQUICKSTOPC-BLACK-2XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":67662707589278,"sku":"NSG-HD-HOODQUICKSTOPC-BLACK-3XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0722\/5288\/3102\/files\/1886f355b4a7fc8b08d20478aad70f39_preview.png?v=1792641580"},{"product_id":"zynville-golf-club-cop-hoodie","title":"Zynville Golf Club Cop Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eMost golf clubs keep a waitlist. The Zynville Golf Club has one member, and everybody on patrol already knows him: beanie, worn coat, perfect follow-through.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA country club crest for officers who've never been invited to one. Good for the range, or for the guy on your squad who won't stop talking about his handicap.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFront: the Zynville Golf Club crest. Upper left sleeve: Zynville Police. On Black.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eHoodie details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCotton Heritage M2580 premium pullover hoodie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% cotton face; 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront pouch pocket, 3-panel hood, matching flat drawstrings\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSelf-fabric patch on the back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL. Sourced from Pakistan\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns small. For the best fit, order one size up.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Nightshift Goons","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":67662722072734,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEGOLFCL-BLACK-S","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":67662722105502,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEGOLFCL-BLACK-M","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":67662722138270,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEGOLFCL-BLACK-L","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":67662722171038,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEGOLFCL-BLACK-XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":67662722203806,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEGOLFCL-BLACK-2XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":67662722236574,"sku":"NSG-HD-ZYNVILLEGOLFCL-BLACK-3XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0722\/5288\/3102\/files\/957e93291e52da329d1857b0d00cfbf3_preview.png?v=1792641593"},{"product_id":"stop-n-rob-corner-store-cop-hoodie-sky","title":"Stop n Rob Corner Store Cop Hoodie – Sky","description":"\u003cp\u003eSame corner store, better weather. This version puts the Stop n Rob sign on a blue sky panel above Zynville Police: the calm before the 2 a.m. call.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePick this one if you want more color on the front than the classic sign.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFront: the Stop n Rob sign on a sky panel over Zynville Police. Upper left sleeve: Zynville Police. On Black.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eHoodie details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCotton Heritage M2580 premium pullover hoodie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% cotton face; 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront pouch pocket, 3-panel hood, matching flat drawstrings\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSelf-fabric patch on the back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL. Sourced from Pakistan\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns small. For the best fit, order one size up.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Nightshift Goons","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":67662725415070,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-S","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":67662725447838,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-M","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":67662725480606,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-L","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":67662725513374,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":67662725546142,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-2XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":67662725578910,"sku":"NSG-HD-STOPNROBCORNER-BLACK-3XL","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0722\/5288\/3102\/files\/cd155ab39cba66410e8b31ad51145226_preview.png?v=1792641606"},{"product_id":"zynville-police-crown-vic-cruiser-hoodie","title":"Zynville Police Crown Vic Cruiser Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe SUVs have more room. The old sedans have more stories. This hoodie is for the officers who learned the job in a black-and-white sedan, here in Zynville Police livery with \"In Zyn We Trust\" on the rear quarter panel.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA strong gift for the veteran officer who still calls it \"the car.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFront: the Zynville Police cruiser. Upper left sleeve: Zynville Police. On Black.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eHoodie details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCotton Heritage M2580 premium pullover hoodie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% cotton face; 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront pouch pocket, 3-panel hood, matching flat drawstrings\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSelf-fabric patch on the back\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL. Sourced from Pakistan\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns small. 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